I can’t believe the time that has gone by that we don’t get to share with each other! In the mornings: you are busy getting ready for work and I am in bed, sleeping, afraid to get up because of the hostility that might occur. I know that the hostilities have nothing to do with our love for each other, but I dread them all the same.
During the day as I wrestle with the aching and bitterness of loneliness I miss you more. I know when you come home you will be tired and the kids will beg for your attention. And being the good father that you are you will give them your attention. Soon we get busy with dinner and the evening is gone. We are so tired that we both crash so fast there is no time for us!
Our 10th anniversary has come and gone, a whole decade of ups and downs that brought us to this point. Some call it a silver anniversary, I’m not sure why, all I do know is that our relationship means more to me than silver or gold. This is the time when we should be celebrating, but in our attempt to do so we only end up sitting down to eat. We can’t talk or visit because of the chaos that has come with us. I love you for trying to make it work. I love our kids, don’t get me wrong I just wish that sometimes we were alone.
There are so many things threatening to pull us apart, but with God on our side no other source can succeed. I will no longer listen to them, God and I will fight to make us work. I must remind myself everyday how I love you so much because these other things can get in the way and make me forget. I love you more and more everyday and I will continue to grow. I have been praying for us and God is showing me where I was wrong. He is teaching me how to love because He is love!
“And we have known and believed the love that God has for us. God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and God in him.” (1 John 4:16)